Friday, November 9, 2012

La Mancha List: The Conclusion

I always like it when the last part of something is called "The Conclusion". It has such a serious air about it.

So today, gentle readers, I bring you the conclusion of the list of stuff that-oh-dear-sweet-fluffy-Lord-I-have-to-actually-DO-now!

76. Learn to play the guitar: Thus fulfilling my teenaged dream of singing and strumming in a coffeeshop somewhere. Also, it seems like a good way to pass the time when the power is out. That's what TV has told me anyway, and we all know TV never lies.

77. Attend a fancy event in a fancy dress custom-made for me: Because even self-actualized, independent liberal gals who scoff at gender stereotypes secretly never completely get over the princess thing.

78. Meet Joss Whedon: There probably shouldn't be anything on the list after this, because once I accomplish this one, my head will explode. Maybe Joss can resurrect me. He likes to do that.

79. Read one of my husband's papers and actually understand it: The first step in this process is managing to stay awake past the first sentence...

80. Have a white Christmas: We came really close a couple of years ago. It snowed most of the day but it was a very wet, slushy snow and it melted as soon as it hit the ground. That doesn't count in my book. Also, bonus points (to the Universe, I suppose), if Bing Crosby comes back from the dead to sing "White Christmas" as it begins to snow.

81. Cook my way through a whole cookbook: You know, the whole Julie & Julia thing. Only NOT The Art of French Cooking because 1. it's been done and 2. there's some gross, gross shit in there, y'all.

82. Get Ry a service dog: We're actually working on this one right now and expect to have it accomplished by next year. You have no idea how vital this could be for him, though. This dog could quite literally save Rylan's life by alerting us before he has a seizure and rolling him onto his side. Ry often vomits during or right after seizures and he doesn't have the ability to roll himself over when he's seizing or in the post-seizure lethargy. Scary stuff.

83. Design my own house: Although there's a decent chance that this could end up like "Mr. Blandings Builds His Dream House" (a hilarious Cary Grant movie, in case you haven't seen it), I think it would be so cool to be solely responsible for all the design features of my house that I hate.

84. Live in the country: When I was growing up, we had friends who lived in the country and their house was the most fun place ever. I think it would be really fun for my kids me live out my latent Laura Ingalls Wilder fantasy.

85. LARP: Yes, it's the very height of nerdiness, and yes I couldn't do it with anyone I know or I'd never want to see them again. Still...I think it might be fun to try...I'm dying to hit someone with a foam sword.

86. Write and record a song: Gotta accomplish 76 first...

87. Start or be involved in an autism charity: There's so much to work for when it comes to autism. The thing that lays most heavily on my heart, though, is the lack of awareness. There are so many autistic kids out there going untreated because their parents are either unaware of the symptoms or don't care. I'm not sure we can help much with the don't care part, but we can educate the public on the symptoms of autism so parents who don't know much about it can recognize it in their children early and get them treatment.

88. Have a giant library with one of those sliding ladder thingys: I would probably then proceed to slide about on it and sing songs from "Beauty and the Beast"...

89. Take Rylan to the opera: For some reason, the boy is delighted by the opera when it's on PBS. He's going to need to learn to control himself a bit more in public before this is feasible, but I think his little brain would explode (um, in a good way) if he got to see opera live.

90. Drive on the freeway: Sigh...this is one that's only on here because I know it's something I should do. I'm perfectly happy sticking to surface streets, but it does become a bit inconvenient to travel from city to city that way (I'm cool with highways, by the way). I just hate the freeway. It's so fast and there are so many jackasses on it and my spatial intelligence and driving ability are terrible. I'm happier avoiding it, in general, but I will drive on it if I absolutely have to. I just haven't absolutely had to very often.

91. Take the kids ice skating: When I was a kid, my grandparents would take my sisters and me to an ice rink in Berkeley and it was THE MOST FUN EVER! My kiddos need to grow up a bit and gain some gross motor skills first, but I think they'd like it.

92. Cook a dish from each country in the world: Not on the same night, obviously.

93. Keep bees: Dylan can take care of them.

94. Have a secret passage in my house: If I get to actually design my own house, it's going to be lousy with secret passages. You're going to get up and try to go to the kitchen for breakfast and end up in the basement.

95. Solve a mystery: I'm leaving this one vague so that I can claim to have solved a mystery when I, say, find my keys in the morning.

96. Visit a psychic: Yeah, I think it's all crap, but I just think it would be interesting to see what s/he would say.

97. Learn to make ceramics: ...or however you properly word that sentence...

98. Make everything we eat for a month: I've certainly gone a week or two this way, but we usually eat take-out or deli stuff once a week, because Mama gets tired and busy. Someday, maybe, I'll be less tired and busy (HA!).

99. Actually eat all my veggies: I eat more fruits and vegetables than the average American (and no, Ronald Reagan, ketchup doesn't count), but I don't usually hit the optimal 9 servings a day (5ish is more typical). Right now, I honestly can't afford to buy that much produce, but eventually that shouldn't be a problem.

100. Go parasailing: Why? Because it just looks so cool.

Oky doky, that's it! The 100 things I'm supposed to do before I kick it! Phew...I know I theoretically have about 50 years to complete this list, but...that's seeming like not a lot of years for all this stuff right now, haha.
I guess I'll start tomorrow...


  1. So much good stuff here! Let's see -

    I would love to cook through a cook book. I have a good one in mind so far, it's called "One Big Table," and this chick traveled the country and picked up recipes. Some people are famous, some are just regular people, and some recipes aren't American food either.

    I hope Rylan gets his dog. I should add to my list, "Help someone get a service dog," so that I can cross something off AND more importantly help someone!

    If for some reason you come to Stillwater, you can LARP right outside my back door. Lol. There is a steel hill and it ends in a foresty, wooded area, and people LAPR there all the time. It's pretty damn funny.

    I want to visit a psychic too! Or at least have my palm read.

  2. I'd totally love to see what a psychic predicts for my life. It's a totally unnerving thought too, but I'm far too nosy to say no if I'm ever in the position to have a reading done.

  3. Your list looks an awful lot like the list in my head. I should probably verbalize it one day. The most important one, though, is the secret passage in my house. I actually have a pinboard on Pinterest says that My dream house has a secret passage. When I told Brian this, he said and a slide. We'll need a slide. So when we look at houses...we plot how to have secret passages and slides. Our realtor loves us. Not.